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In pursuit of happiness
Are you a 'glass half empty' or a 'glass half full' kind of person?
What does that even mean? What if your glass is half full of something you don't even like? Surely that is not happiness?
In truth, the complexity of our day-to-day lives, and the wisdom to understand that things are seldom as black and white as 'empty versus full' is what makes us human. We seldom experience perfection and, if we live to expect it, then we shall regularly feel disappointment.
Yet there is beauty in most things that we can celebrate once we attune ourselves to find it: the tonal shades of an icy-cold frosty morning; a wonderful latte, albeit in your favourite chipped cup; the bittersweet last day of the most wonderful holiday; a walk in the park after a morning of intense work. I could go on…
They say that with age comes wisdom, and for years I wondered what that meant. What would this mysterious superpower be like? Was this saying even true? Would I suddenly have the key to all my unanswered problems?
In a sense, yes I would, for wisdom has showed me the misguidedness of waiting for happiness; it has kindly but very forcibly pointed out the day-to-day disappointment that one feels if we save up our happiness for the future. How many times have you told yourself, "when I've finished this, I'll be happy," or "when I've saved up for that, I'll be happy," or even "when I've replaced that old, chipped cup I'll have my perfect morning coffee"?
The trouble is, the promised day of happiness never comes for - by the time it does - we're in pursuit of something else entirely and have forgotten to take notice of what we once strived for.
Real happiness is momentary and it's there for the noticing – although we all too often don’t do so. When you have made this your habit, you cannot stop seeing happy points, twinkling away like fairy lights on the darkest night. Sure, the dark is still there but it's made easier by the sparkle.
And what else have I learnt? Simply that the darkest of dark patches, once overcome, result in a feeling of true pride - a moment to celebrate resilience and tenacity, a chance to be grateful to oneself for having the ability to keep going through the struggle.
This time of year is always tough, with dark evenings, cold mornings, wet break-times, mock exams... but there is always something small to be happy about, and just the simple act of gratitude will provide a little more fuel for the tough points.
Try it, make it part of your daily habits, and watch those fairy lights twinkle!
